For those that may not know, even though the surgery was a total success, there were still pathology reports that we were waiting for to see if the margins around the tumor were clean or free from cancer. That report was given to us on Tuesday by Dr. Goff. All the margins were clean and no traces of cancer in the tissue around the tumor were present! There was some residual cells which is not uncommon but that can be treated with a combination of radiation/chemo and in my case hopefully will be very minimal. It is interesting to note that Dr. Goff placed clips inside my chest wall where he thought the areas that would most likely have cancer in the tissue and all of those places came back negative for cancer.
From a spiritual perspective, my father has given me many blessings through this fight with cancer and every time he has specifically blessed me with "clean margins" around the tumor. I am grateful for those blessings of a loving father and his faith in the Lord's ability to treat me and make me whole again.
I have a follow up on October 22nd, and from there we'll know what post surgery treatment I will have and we will go from there. Thank you for your continued thoughts, faith, love, support, and prayers.
Friday, October 5, 2012
Miracles Never Ceased and Continue Today!
It has been nine days since I had my surgery and I thought today would be a good time to update everyone on what has transpired since my last post as well. As you know, September 26th was the big day of surgery and it was a total success! Before I elaborate more on the success of the the surgery there are some things I would like share. The first thing is I have always maintained that miracles do exist even in our day and time. Even as pessimistic or unbelieving that society has become, it doesn't change the fact that God continues to perform miracles today just as in biblical times.
Secondly, until about two weeks ago, I had thought that faith was the main factor in whether miracles happen or not. I have learned in my experience that it is more than just faith. It is having the faith that the miracle sought out is possible, and accepting God's will unconditionally even if his will is not to perform the sought out miracle. When Dr. Goff met with us a few weeks ago before the surgery, he said that the reduction of 60% was great news and that we should be happy about that. He also said there was a chance he may not be able to remove all the tumor because of its location so close to the aorta and left subclavian artery. He said he'd do his best but that was the possibility to be aware of. After months of chemotherapy, after being emotionally and physically tired for so long, it took some time to take in that the tumor may not be able to be removed in its entirety. It was probably the hardest thing for me to say, "Heavenly Father, I have the faith that the surgery will be a success and the tumor will be removed in its entirety, if it is thy will. I accept thy will whatever the outcome may be." Once I truly accepted it in my heart and my mind I was very much at peace and went into the surgery very calm still not knowing what the final outcome would be but knowing that a loving Heavenly Father was with me and watching over me.
Returning to the success of the surgery. The surgery lasted 6 hours and I am glad I was the one having surgery because had I been in the waiting room, I'm sure it would have been the longest 6 hours of my life. Dr. Goff was able to use his great talents and I feel God blessed him as well so that he'd be sharp and precise and he removed the tumor in its entirety. He did have to do some grafting on my left lung and inside the chest wall. There was even removal of a great portion of the innominate vein. There also was some dissecting around the nerve that is part of the voice box and Dr. Goff thought my voice would be soft or hoarse for many months and that I would even need speech therapy. None of that was the case and I was sipping water and talking to my nurse within a few hours of being transferred to my room. I count that as another miracle, and the miracles have been many.
I was suppose to stay in the ICU for at least two days depending on my recuperation and progress. Within about 15 hours I was transferred to a regular room with the ability to eat anything I wanted. Previously I had been restricted to no food and only able to take liquids by sucking on a sponge. Last time I had the sternotomy, it lasted only 2 hours and I was in the hospital for 5 days. This time it was 6 hours and I was home within three days. I got home Saturday and have been up and walking around, and going up and down the stairs by myself. The first time I had the surgery, Gloria had to bathe me for a week, and this time she only had to bathe me on Saturday and I have been blessed to do it myself everyday this week.
What I have taken from this whole journey that started back in May is there are little miracles that happen everyday of our lives. The question is do we have our eyes openly spiritually enough to recognize them? I am so grateful for this experience as it has taught me to treasure life on a deeper level and to recognize what a blessing it is to just go for a walk or sit down to eat dinner with the ones you love. I look forward to each day looking for that miracle whether big or small because they are there, we just have to keep our eyes open long enough to see them.
Secondly, until about two weeks ago, I had thought that faith was the main factor in whether miracles happen or not. I have learned in my experience that it is more than just faith. It is having the faith that the miracle sought out is possible, and accepting God's will unconditionally even if his will is not to perform the sought out miracle. When Dr. Goff met with us a few weeks ago before the surgery, he said that the reduction of 60% was great news and that we should be happy about that. He also said there was a chance he may not be able to remove all the tumor because of its location so close to the aorta and left subclavian artery. He said he'd do his best but that was the possibility to be aware of. After months of chemotherapy, after being emotionally and physically tired for so long, it took some time to take in that the tumor may not be able to be removed in its entirety. It was probably the hardest thing for me to say, "Heavenly Father, I have the faith that the surgery will be a success and the tumor will be removed in its entirety, if it is thy will. I accept thy will whatever the outcome may be." Once I truly accepted it in my heart and my mind I was very much at peace and went into the surgery very calm still not knowing what the final outcome would be but knowing that a loving Heavenly Father was with me and watching over me.
Returning to the success of the surgery. The surgery lasted 6 hours and I am glad I was the one having surgery because had I been in the waiting room, I'm sure it would have been the longest 6 hours of my life. Dr. Goff was able to use his great talents and I feel God blessed him as well so that he'd be sharp and precise and he removed the tumor in its entirety. He did have to do some grafting on my left lung and inside the chest wall. There was even removal of a great portion of the innominate vein. There also was some dissecting around the nerve that is part of the voice box and Dr. Goff thought my voice would be soft or hoarse for many months and that I would even need speech therapy. None of that was the case and I was sipping water and talking to my nurse within a few hours of being transferred to my room. I count that as another miracle, and the miracles have been many.
I was suppose to stay in the ICU for at least two days depending on my recuperation and progress. Within about 15 hours I was transferred to a regular room with the ability to eat anything I wanted. Previously I had been restricted to no food and only able to take liquids by sucking on a sponge. Last time I had the sternotomy, it lasted only 2 hours and I was in the hospital for 5 days. This time it was 6 hours and I was home within three days. I got home Saturday and have been up and walking around, and going up and down the stairs by myself. The first time I had the surgery, Gloria had to bathe me for a week, and this time she only had to bathe me on Saturday and I have been blessed to do it myself everyday this week.
What I have taken from this whole journey that started back in May is there are little miracles that happen everyday of our lives. The question is do we have our eyes openly spiritually enough to recognize them? I am so grateful for this experience as it has taught me to treasure life on a deeper level and to recognize what a blessing it is to just go for a walk or sit down to eat dinner with the ones you love. I look forward to each day looking for that miracle whether big or small because they are there, we just have to keep our eyes open long enough to see them.
Sunday, September 16, 2012
September is Here
We are now in September and we have met with Dr. Goff the surgeon on September 10th. He was very thorough and explained to us the risks and scenarios that might take place during the surgery. There is probably one nerve and vein that they will have to sacrifice but he feels they are already not working because of how my diaphragm on the left side isn't working and the vein is where the blot clot was and the tumor had it closed off as well and the blood has re-routed itself and so I haven't been using it for some time. He did say he wanted to check with some other cancer centers to make sure that there isn't some other treatment they should be doing per-operation. He said it was good that the tumor shrunk 60% and he had hoped it would have shrunk more to make sure that he can take out all of it. Worst case scenario, he may have to leave some of the tumor in if it is close to some arteries that they can't mess around with. If that is the case then there may be some treatment of chemo with radiation but we won't know until we get the surgery.
The surgery is scheduled for September 26th. Dr. Goff has already spoken with the National Cancer Institute in D.C., and the medical oncologist who authored the papers on how to treat thymic cancer. This medical oncologist said that Dr. Goff and Johnson have done everything he would have done and that surgery is the best option now. He said he would look at the CT scans and let Dr. Goff know if there is anything else he can offer in terms of input after reviewing them. Dr. Goff said it was comforting to know that the person who authored the treatment of thymic cancer agreed that they have done the right treatment. So until then to all my friends and family, we'll be looking towards the 26th and from there I promise to be more prompt in getting an update on the blog. I ask for your continued prayers, faith, and thoughts on behalf of myself and my family. As my dad told me on every letter during my two years on a mission: "Keep the Faith"
The surgery is scheduled for September 26th. Dr. Goff has already spoken with the National Cancer Institute in D.C., and the medical oncologist who authored the papers on how to treat thymic cancer. This medical oncologist said that Dr. Goff and Johnson have done everything he would have done and that surgery is the best option now. He said he would look at the CT scans and let Dr. Goff know if there is anything else he can offer in terms of input after reviewing them. Dr. Goff said it was comforting to know that the person who authored the treatment of thymic cancer agreed that they have done the right treatment. So until then to all my friends and family, we'll be looking towards the 26th and from there I promise to be more prompt in getting an update on the blog. I ask for your continued prayers, faith, and thoughts on behalf of myself and my family. As my dad told me on every letter during my two years on a mission: "Keep the Faith"
Labor Day Weekend
With everything that has happened in the last month, Gloria and I decided we needed a break. So we decided to use some free nights we had in Vegas and headed down there over Labor Day weekend. We took Zoe and Gloria's aunt with of us of course. It was great and a lot of fun and all we did was hang out. I think the fact that we got out of town we kind of forgot about everything and just enjoyed each others company. Zoe loved the Bellagio's water show even though it would startle her every time the water would shoot up in the air. She loved the pool too where we stayed.
When I was driving back and forth to St. George during the floods in 2011. I was making the trip weekly for about four months. I never stopped at Cove Fort near Beaver. This time on our way down we stopped and had one of the best experiences with the missionaries down there getting a tour of Cove Fort and learning about it. I recommend anyone heading either down or back to take an hour out of your drive and go have a great spiritual experience there.
When I was driving back and forth to St. George during the floods in 2011. I was making the trip weekly for about four months. I never stopped at Cove Fort near Beaver. This time on our way down we stopped and had one of the best experiences with the missionaries down there getting a tour of Cove Fort and learning about it. I recommend anyone heading either down or back to take an hour out of your drive and go have a great spiritual experience there.
What a Journey Thus Far!
My last post was July 30th and I apologize to those that may have been worried that something bad happened or that sometimes just not knowing can make one nervous. I was suppose to start my 4th round of chemotherapy on August 7th, but I was a little sick and so I had to wait until August 13th because the my oncologist said that even little cold combined with chemotherapy could have serious consequences to my health and my immune system. I was a little bummed by that news but at the same time knew that following my doctor's instructions is kind of like following a map. If you pay close attention to where you need to go you'll most undoubtedly make to your destination. If you don't pay close attention then you'll most likely end up way off course and then it takes that much more effort to get back on track.
August 13th came and went for my chemotherapy. I did pretty good this time but it was a little bit lonely because Gloria was unable to stay with me all the days I was there. There is always a positive for every negative I believe and that positive is the time away during the night and day always makes the heart the fonder. I didn't have any complications and as much as the nurses were so wonderful I told them that I hope I don't have to see them again. This was my final round of chemotherapy in the sense of being in the hospital for three days at a time receiving 72 straight hours of it. If I do have to do follow-up chemotherapy it will most likely be an outpatient and last only a few hours. I'm grateful to the medical oncology staff at McKay for their awesomeness in taking care of me.
August 21st I had a CT scan to see what the effects the third and fourth rounds of chemotherapy had on the tumor. This time though it didn't become a waiting game as the hospital had all the information from the previous scans and by Friday, August 24th we found out that the tumor had shrunk another 10%. 60% in total which I was very excited about and thankful to my Heavenly Father because the cancer is so rare that there is not a lot of information on how to treat it. My oncologist said many times the tumor will start to become resistant to the chemo drugs and so he said the reward does not outweigh the effects and so he wasn't going to recommend any more chemo rounds because of the toll it was taking on me. He said that surgery was the next step. They also found a blood clot on the CT scan so I had to go back in for an ultrasound to confirm the blood clot and was then put on blood thinners and some really "fun" shots that have to be administered into the stomach near the belly button. I'm glad I'm done with those for the time being.
This same day I started getting more of the chemo effects that I have not had to endure up to this point. This one being canker sores all over the inside of my mouth, a bad cough, and loss of appetite I spent from Friday, August 24th to August 26th in bed too ill to even get up. I did get some awesome medicine from my doctor that temporarily numbed the mouth. As I was laying in bed and just feeling physically horrible the following scripture came to my mind: "But that ye have patience, and bear with those afflictions, with a firm hope that ye shall one day rest from all your afflictions." (Alma 34:41) I can say that this is true. Patience and trust in the Lord. At the time it seems that our troubles and afflictions may never pass but they do.
August 27th seemed like a normal day. I had a little bit of a cough and even went to the doctor's office to have my white blood count checked. I talked to my doctor a little and said I was fine for the most part just a little bit of coughing here and there but nothing serious. Well later that night around 9:00 PM I started to have a cough attack and ended up in the emergency room at Davis Hospital. My awesome brother Josh was there as he works there to get me in quick to see a doctor. They ran some tests and checked my blood and got me some good cough medicine so I could sleep. They found I had a respiratory infection and the blood tests came back that my white blood count was low and that my platelets were low as well. So the next day I went back to my doctor and got a white blood cell booster shot and also scheduled a platelet transfusion at McKay. The platelet transfusion was August 29th and it was quick and easy but man do those things make you sick as can be. The good thing is the effect was short lasting and by the evening I was feeling a lot better.
So we've had a few bumps in the road since finishing the last round of chemotherapy to say the least. Its okay though because we could have had these after each chemo session and I'm so grateful that I didn't. It's a question of attitude. Is the cup half empty or is it half full. We can either go in with a good attitude and a grateful heart for all the blessings we have in our lives or be negative and be bitter which doesn't help us grow or learn. If we don't grow and learn what was the point of going through everything? God doesn't allow us to go through trials just because. I strongly believe there is a reason for it and if we are willing to submit to his will, I know we'll come out stronger physically and spiritually and will be better people because of it.
August 13th came and went for my chemotherapy. I did pretty good this time but it was a little bit lonely because Gloria was unable to stay with me all the days I was there. There is always a positive for every negative I believe and that positive is the time away during the night and day always makes the heart the fonder. I didn't have any complications and as much as the nurses were so wonderful I told them that I hope I don't have to see them again. This was my final round of chemotherapy in the sense of being in the hospital for three days at a time receiving 72 straight hours of it. If I do have to do follow-up chemotherapy it will most likely be an outpatient and last only a few hours. I'm grateful to the medical oncology staff at McKay for their awesomeness in taking care of me.
August 21st I had a CT scan to see what the effects the third and fourth rounds of chemotherapy had on the tumor. This time though it didn't become a waiting game as the hospital had all the information from the previous scans and by Friday, August 24th we found out that the tumor had shrunk another 10%. 60% in total which I was very excited about and thankful to my Heavenly Father because the cancer is so rare that there is not a lot of information on how to treat it. My oncologist said many times the tumor will start to become resistant to the chemo drugs and so he said the reward does not outweigh the effects and so he wasn't going to recommend any more chemo rounds because of the toll it was taking on me. He said that surgery was the next step. They also found a blood clot on the CT scan so I had to go back in for an ultrasound to confirm the blood clot and was then put on blood thinners and some really "fun" shots that have to be administered into the stomach near the belly button. I'm glad I'm done with those for the time being.
This same day I started getting more of the chemo effects that I have not had to endure up to this point. This one being canker sores all over the inside of my mouth, a bad cough, and loss of appetite I spent from Friday, August 24th to August 26th in bed too ill to even get up. I did get some awesome medicine from my doctor that temporarily numbed the mouth. As I was laying in bed and just feeling physically horrible the following scripture came to my mind: "But that ye have patience, and bear with those afflictions, with a firm hope that ye shall one day rest from all your afflictions." (Alma 34:41) I can say that this is true. Patience and trust in the Lord. At the time it seems that our troubles and afflictions may never pass but they do.
August 27th seemed like a normal day. I had a little bit of a cough and even went to the doctor's office to have my white blood count checked. I talked to my doctor a little and said I was fine for the most part just a little bit of coughing here and there but nothing serious. Well later that night around 9:00 PM I started to have a cough attack and ended up in the emergency room at Davis Hospital. My awesome brother Josh was there as he works there to get me in quick to see a doctor. They ran some tests and checked my blood and got me some good cough medicine so I could sleep. They found I had a respiratory infection and the blood tests came back that my white blood count was low and that my platelets were low as well. So the next day I went back to my doctor and got a white blood cell booster shot and also scheduled a platelet transfusion at McKay. The platelet transfusion was August 29th and it was quick and easy but man do those things make you sick as can be. The good thing is the effect was short lasting and by the evening I was feeling a lot better.
So we've had a few bumps in the road since finishing the last round of chemotherapy to say the least. Its okay though because we could have had these after each chemo session and I'm so grateful that I didn't. It's a question of attitude. Is the cup half empty or is it half full. We can either go in with a good attitude and a grateful heart for all the blessings we have in our lives or be negative and be bitter which doesn't help us grow or learn. If we don't grow and learn what was the point of going through everything? God doesn't allow us to go through trials just because. I strongly believe there is a reason for it and if we are willing to submit to his will, I know we'll come out stronger physically and spiritually and will be better people because of it.
Monday, July 30, 2012
I've Been a Little Tired
I guess my posts are becoming more sporadic as the more chemotherapy I am doing, the more it is taking a toll on my body in the sense of being tired. I still feel good and am up and about doing the things that I need to get done, but that extra energy and focus is sometimes hard to find. I still consider myself very blessed as I am still able to do quite a few of normal things like go to the store, drive myself around, go to church (at least the first hour), and most importantly spend quality time with Gloria and Zoe.
Now for the update! As stated previously I was admitted to the hospital for a third round of chemotherapy on July 17th. It went well and I was home on Friday afternoon July 20th. I was a little bit tired though and unfortunately was not able to return to work the following week. During the 1st and 2nd round of chemo I was able to return to work by the following Thursday but it just didn't happen this time. All is okay because I was able to get a few work related items done from home and my friends at work (they are so much more than just co-workers) have been and continue to be a great support. I'm excited to be back in the office tomorrow and get some things done. There is a great feeling that is hard to describe about having some normality and even routine come back into one's life.
Until the next time, thank you for all your support and prayers!
Now for the update! As stated previously I was admitted to the hospital for a third round of chemotherapy on July 17th. It went well and I was home on Friday afternoon July 20th. I was a little bit tired though and unfortunately was not able to return to work the following week. During the 1st and 2nd round of chemo I was able to return to work by the following Thursday but it just didn't happen this time. All is okay because I was able to get a few work related items done from home and my friends at work (they are so much more than just co-workers) have been and continue to be a great support. I'm excited to be back in the office tomorrow and get some things done. There is a great feeling that is hard to describe about having some normality and even routine come back into one's life.
Until the next time, thank you for all your support and prayers!
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Belated Update...Lots of News
My last post was July 8th and now it is July 17th today. The reason for such a delay is because the quality of effective care at the Radiology Department at McKay-Dee is greatly lacking. I had a CT scan on July 9th and they did not inform me that I needed to provide them with a copy of the first CT scan from the clinic where it was taken. The next day I went and got another copy from the Tanner Clinic and drove it up to the Radiology Department at McKay-Dee and hand delivered it and then things just went downhill from there.
A radiologist reviewed the first CT scan and instead of finishing his report and attaching his addendum to it, he didn't finish it until Friday the 13th and didn't finish it until the evening which by then resulted in my doctor's office being closed and unable to receive the report. I had an appointment yesterday July 16th with Dr. Johnson and even though both CT scans were in the system with their reports, the Radiology Department did not do a comparison of the two CT scans and therefore Dr. Johnson was unable to make an exact determination of the progress. How does it take someone a whole week to do a work up on one CT scan and then not even compare the two? Talk about inefficiency and a complete disappointment. Please note that this is the Radiology Department only. Dr. Johnson, his staff, and the oncology nurses at McKay are awesome!
The good news from all of this is Dr. Johnson was able to look at the two scans and determine that the tumor has shrunk around 40% from the first two rounds. That is great news! 40% is almost half and that is great progress. Dr. Johnson immediately consulted with Dr. Goff and even though Dr. Goff said he could operate it would be better to do two more rounds of chemotherapy to see if we can get the tumor down to another 40%. This would take away the danger and complications of having to sacrifice some major blood vessels and a major nerve that controls the diaphragm on the left side. So today it is July 17th and we are in the hospital for another round. I look at it this way. I've gone two rounds with this tumor, I have blackened both of its eyes, drawn blood from its nose, face, and mouth. I haven't quite knocked it out but that will happen after a few more rounds. I am kicking its butt and I don't plan on letting up on it. This is the Rocky in me.
Of course in all reality it is not me that is kicking this cancer's butt. I still truly believe that the Lord has his hand in every aspect of my life and that he is blessing me with the ability to be healed. In the New Testament of the Bible there was a blind man that was called by the Lord to come unto him. When he came unto Jesus he was asked what Jesus could do for him. He asked that he could have his vision restored and Jesus said to him, "thy faith hath made thee whole" (Mark 10:52). If faith can make a blind man see again then faith can heal me of this tumor. Thank you again to everyone for your continued support and prayers!
A radiologist reviewed the first CT scan and instead of finishing his report and attaching his addendum to it, he didn't finish it until Friday the 13th and didn't finish it until the evening which by then resulted in my doctor's office being closed and unable to receive the report. I had an appointment yesterday July 16th with Dr. Johnson and even though both CT scans were in the system with their reports, the Radiology Department did not do a comparison of the two CT scans and therefore Dr. Johnson was unable to make an exact determination of the progress. How does it take someone a whole week to do a work up on one CT scan and then not even compare the two? Talk about inefficiency and a complete disappointment. Please note that this is the Radiology Department only. Dr. Johnson, his staff, and the oncology nurses at McKay are awesome!
The good news from all of this is Dr. Johnson was able to look at the two scans and determine that the tumor has shrunk around 40% from the first two rounds. That is great news! 40% is almost half and that is great progress. Dr. Johnson immediately consulted with Dr. Goff and even though Dr. Goff said he could operate it would be better to do two more rounds of chemotherapy to see if we can get the tumor down to another 40%. This would take away the danger and complications of having to sacrifice some major blood vessels and a major nerve that controls the diaphragm on the left side. So today it is July 17th and we are in the hospital for another round. I look at it this way. I've gone two rounds with this tumor, I have blackened both of its eyes, drawn blood from its nose, face, and mouth. I haven't quite knocked it out but that will happen after a few more rounds. I am kicking its butt and I don't plan on letting up on it. This is the Rocky in me.
Of course in all reality it is not me that is kicking this cancer's butt. I still truly believe that the Lord has his hand in every aspect of my life and that he is blessing me with the ability to be healed. In the New Testament of the Bible there was a blind man that was called by the Lord to come unto him. When he came unto Jesus he was asked what Jesus could do for him. He asked that he could have his vision restored and Jesus said to him, "thy faith hath made thee whole" (Mark 10:52). If faith can make a blind man see again then faith can heal me of this tumor. Thank you again to everyone for your continued support and prayers!
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